'The Wicker Man is Gone in 60 Ghost Riders'...

AKA: Drive Angry.

As if I need to say anything more that what I typed above...Here is the description Apple provides for this "movie":

'In the newest 3D action-adventure from the director of MY BLOODY VALENTINE, DRIVE ANGRY stars Nicolas Cage as Milton, a hardened felon who has broken out of hell for one last chance at redemption. Intent on stopping a vicious cult who murdered his daughter, he has three days to stop them before they sacrifice her baby beneath a full moon. He's joined by Piper (Amber Heard) - a young, sexy waitress who liberates her ex-boyfriend's cherry-red muscle car in order to help Milton. Now, the two of them are hot on the trail of the deadly leader of the cult, Jonah King (Billy Burke), who believes it is his destiny to use the baby to unleash hell on earth. But the bloodthirsty cult is the least of Milton's problems. The police are after him too. And worse, an enigmatic killer known only as "The Accountant" - who has been sent by the Devil to retrieve Milton and deliver him back to hell. With wicked cunning and hypnotic savagery, the Accountant will relentlessly pursue Milton at high speed across the country until his mission is accomplished. Fueled by high octane and pure rage, Milton must use his anger to go beyond all human limits to avenge his daughter's murder, before his last chance at redemption is revoked.'

If you STILL need some kind of proof that this is a stupid waste of what I would have once called Celluloid, but now deem pixels, here's the trailer where we see Wickerman/Ghost Rider combine with Gone in 60 Seconds to make this...thing.

'Drive Angry' IN 3D! trailer

Oh look! ANOTHER 3D movie. This one has Nicolas Cage playing Ghost Rider minus the flaming skull, but with just as much, if not more, bad acting and hair.

And things ESPLODE! IN 3D!

Goodie!

'Bad Lieutenant: Port of Call New Orleans' Trailer

I'm not sure why there is a recent desire, nay, need to name every movie with 42 different words. Is 'Bad Lieutenant' not good enough? It must have the Port of New Orleans? Is the reason New Orleans is there because we want to make sure everyone knows it takes place/was filmed in New Orleans? Because if that was the case, just name it Port of New Orleans.

I do think it might be okay to see. Yes Nicolas Cage continues to play a variation of Nicolas Cage. That would be "Crazy Eyes"-Cage.

Next up: Half-way Decent Laundry Cleaner: Angel of New-South Hamptom Wales New Zealand Key Largo-East.