A Movie We Never Asked For: A Remake of 'Death At A Funeral'

Three short years ago a movie came out. It was called 'Death at a Funeral'. It was British. It was about a group of people in a family that come together for a funeral. Several things occur, such as the funeral parlor bringing the wrong body, the discovery the dad was gay and was with his long-time partner who also happens to be a midget, one of the family members with some anxiety issues accidentally being fed some mind-altering drugs instead of Valium...the list of things goes on and on. It's very funny, it has a great cast including Peter Dinklage, Alan Tudyk and Matthew MacFayden. It's got the funny British comedy and charm and Alan Tudyk 100% steals the movie. Here is the trailer:



Now...someone thought it was not only required to remake this movie, but make it in the style of a stupid Martin Lawrence/Tracy Morgan/Chris Rock vehicle wherein the above mentioned names play themselves. Oh and instead of Alan Tudyk we are given James Marsden as the unwilling drug-taker who stumbles around like a madman. The problem with this is that Marsden, while pretty to look at and an alright actor, is not Alan Tudyk. He isn't funny like Tudyk. He isn't charming like Tudyk. For God's sake, he isn't Tudyk. Also, I suspect he shall just be the "look at that stupid funny white boy" character. I also assume his wife/girlfriend will have to constantly defend why she's with this crazy white boy. Oh Dinklage, for some reason, is the only one in both movies, playing the same character. Here are the stupid things that go down in the "remake": The wrong body brought to the funeral is a Chinese man. Not funny, considering the original was a body that COULD have belonged to the family. This version it's just stupid. One woman gets smacked in the face by the mother. There are comments about a date being real young but her ass being in grad school...yes, that happens. There are some midget jokes too. Hahahaha...so unfunny all around. Yeah. Here is the retched trailer.



Terrible.



Considering the original is only three years old, I don't really know why it would be required to make a new one at all, let alone a version so markedly different, so obviously trying to be original and "fresh" while just seeming completely unnecessary.

If we work hard enough...we CAN succeed!

Alright, I've said it before. If you stop going to see crappy movies, they will stop making them. Case in point: Some awful movie with Robin Williams was scrapped by Disney after Old Dogs performed horribly bad. This is something I could have told them before wasting money on it, but whatever. Now, news rolls in that the sequel to Wild Hogs, Wild Hogs 2: Bachelor Ride (yeah...that was the name), has been scrapped as well.

Now, let's give it a go with movies like 'Chipmunks 2: Electric Boogaloo' or whatever the abomination with chipmunks that talk, go to school and hit on human woman is. This should be the mission of all parents and singles out there. We can't do this alone. Lie to your children and tell them the movie is sold out, not out yet, you missed it; whatever it takes to stop them from making live-action/CGI-talking animal movies. If we try hard enough maybe we can stop the Marmaduke movie I just saw a poster for last weekend.

I'd say to try to stop Roland Emmerich movies, but even though I hate his movies, I have to say...without them my masterpiece Code Name: Rainbow Brite couldn't have been a reality.

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