Thursday, August 19, 2010

'My Soul to Take' Trailer's almost, just almost, as if Wes Craven recently watched 'Scream', remembered it made a lot of money, watched some of his other movies, realized people also watched them, and then thought, "Let me mash them all together into one, giant, shitty piece of shit...and MAKE IT 3D!" Because that is what this movie looks and sounds like.

Pay no attention to the fact that the kid they show getting killed in the beginning is shown moments later when the group of idiot teenagers are standing in the woods, even though they insinuate that the kid died 100 years ago, or whatever the story is...I don't care.

Basically, they tell the whole story, little Jimmy has dreams, or something, of someone getting killed and then those people seem to have been killed. A bunch of idiots go into the woods on the very night Hobo John disappeared or something and they all start dying. But Hobo John might just might be the daddy of little Jimmy. Or little Jimmy might be the killer. Most likely, it's either his mother (SO original) or little Jimmy's sister, angry that Hobo John/Daddy never loved her.

That about sounds right. And IT'S IN 3D!

Wednesday, August 18, 2010

'Vanishing on 7th Street" trailer

This was filmed in and around the Metro Detroit area, and sounds a lot like Pitch Black on Earth. Not that that means it will be bad, I really like Pitch Black.

The premise sounds like many, a man wakes up one morning to find everyone gone, their clothes, cars, planes scattered around where they stood, parked where they rolled and crashing from the sky. He finds a group of people in a bar and they all seem to realize that what's keeping them alive is the light. It's only 11am and it's pitch black outside. Where did the sun/day go? It appears there is "something" in the darkness and shadows. It kind of looks creepy, but chances are it'll end up like "Gothika"; a giant steaming pile of shit.

Tuesday, August 3, 2010

'Valhalla Rising' Trailer and clips

Now this movie looks just beautiful! The production and cinematography is stunning.

Mads Mikkelsen plays One Eye, a warrior-slave with some kind of supernatural strength/power who gets the leg up on his captors, escapes and goes on a journey with his young boy companion. He meets up with some Vikings and joins them. That's about all I understand of this movie and I don't care because it looks beautiful. Also, I'm unsure why they all have Scottish accents, including the Vikings, but we'll let that slide.

Here are some trailers and clips:

-Ignore the English subtitles over the film where they are speaking English.

'Let Me In' Red Band Trailer

I've been bitching about this remake (that no one asked for or needed) since I first heard about it. It's stupid and this trailer doesn't convince me otherwise.

'Let Me In' is a remake of the Swedish film/book Låt den rätte komma in. A book and film, that while different in some places, are perfect as they are. It got some attention as being great and some shithead thought, "Let's buy the rights and remake it!" So they did.

The rough story is that Oskar is a loner who constantly gets picked on at school. Then a little girl/boy (it's really difficult to tell in the original whether the little girl playing Eli is a girl or boy) named Eli moves in next door and they become friends. Unfortunately, people have been going missing or show up murdered and the attention of the authorities is getting closer and closer to the apartment building where Oskar and Eli live. It's tense, dark, scary. Everything that the remake appears to lack. Much like Den Osynlige, which changed the ending to a much happier ending.

Chloe Moretz, while awesome as Hit Girl and everything, does not in any way, shape or form look androgynous. She looks like a little girl. Lina Leandersson looked androgynous and I really spent most of the movie, before looking her up on imdb, wondering if it was a girl or boy playing Eli. She also looked like she smelled as bad as Oskar described her as smelling. Moretz looks like a girl, sounds like a girl, and based on what I've seen of the remake, looks like she smells like roses and cookies not death and blood. As far as Oskar/Owen go, I think Kodi Smit-Mcphee has that "loner, loser, weak-kid" look that Oskar had, so that might work.

They even changed the location to New Mexico. Why? Why change it from a cold, desolate town? You could have placed it in Maine, or North Dakota or freakin' Canada! But, New Mexico? Their names have been changed as well. Now they are Owen and Abby. Yeah...Abby. There's a real question as to the gender there.

Since I still have not seen a remake of a foreign movie that was as good, or better, than the original and I don't think this is going to be the one to do that either. Let us look at the "gem" that is the remake and the GEM that is the original:

There are several clips on and you can also watch the movie on Netflix. It's slow and not like American horror movies, but it's great.

'Sucker Punch' Trailer

I don't really know what the hell this is about. Well, I do now because I read the description, but still.

Apparently set in the 1950's, the story is about some girl who is sent to a insane asylum and created this alternate reality where she plans to escape by stealing 5 objects. It sort of looks like 'Shutter Island meets Mortal Kombat'...or something.

It's a strange mash-up that could be good or bad. I don't know how to feel about it at this moment.

'Don't Be Afraid of the Dark' Teaser

I wasn't sure about this at first because it's a black screen with a hissy voice talking about the dark and then a whole bunch of images of a mansion and people screaming, etc. When I saw Guillermo del Toro's name, however, I immediately perked up. I also perked up during the next scene when the little girl is crawling under the sheets, knowing what would be coming, and yet I still jumped when the thing jumped at her.

Also, Guy Pearce is in it.